Privacy.

Those that know me well, know that I live for this in my daily life.

People that know me a little may think I am a rather outgoing person. I am not quiet, and I am not shy as to offering my opinions or thoughts, nor do I stay away from the random conversation with a stranger.

I don’t think people in the latter category could say that they actually know lots about me, however. Let me explain.

Some time ago, I pulled the majority of my pictures and personal information from my Facebook account. I have accumulated too many “friends” there, in my own opinion. I’m happy to have people interested in connecting with me, but I do not plan to share much with those I have never personally met (from the various groups I am a part of), or those I haven’t shared my life with in many years. Both of these scenarios conflict with the electronic personal boundaries I have set for myself and my family. In other words, since I do not have an in-person relationship with many of my Facebook friends, my content on my page will rarely be directly personal.

I also covet my very close relationships, especially the ones I have with my husband and children. I no longer feel their lives should be projected in places where they may not appreciate someday.

I honestly LOVE that no one knows when my guy and I have a date, take a trip, or celebrate a birthday or milestone. There are few people I know that would genuinely care about some of these matters, and frankly, I’ve learned that I am confident enough to NOT need Congratulations for every little thing. I am deeply satisfied in holding our special couple moments privately, and then keeping them as ours only.

As my children have gotten older, I’ve recognized that they may not want their pictures being shared with those outside of our inner circle. I have decided that they should pave their own way (if they so choose) into the online scene without my versions and depictions of them. Additionally, in the age of child trafficking and a stranger-knows-best social mentality, I am adamant to let my kids grow up without daily staged lives, unrealistic expectations, unsolicited contact and opinions, and continuous forced activities and their “required” documentation (although I do enjoy forcing a good photo from time to time 🀣). I want my love to be more evident in their lives individually, not just as referenced in my personal on-line testament; and if others love my children as they claim to, its display should be obvious in person as well.

At my age, I understand the turmoil life brings. I know my days may not always be like I post on social media, therefore I’ve decided to AVOID posting most private things altogether (my personal IG is screened heavily).

How many of you have friends on Facebook or elsewhere relentlessly posting about the successes of their life, only to learn later that they are getting divorced, going broke, or living a different life than virtually seen? I struggle with this; and not because I fault them for sharing their life with their world. Since I don’t know what the future holds for me, I do not want the visibility, speculation, or the self-felt responsibility to have to continue to explain myself ever, if you will. My choices are mine. I refuse to constantly paint my life’s picture to those completely unwilling to see it. I’ve determined that regular social media announcements and explanations do not feel natural to me. If this leads to someone thinking I am inauthentic, then so be it. Those I am most close to know this as completely false.

I do know that some of you reading this are completely transparent in your regular posts! Kudos to you! With all life’s uncertainties, you definitely will impact someone with your stories, trials, and successes! I hope I affect others as well, but in a more exclusive and obscure way. I still love to connect with distant family and old friends, and I am always happy to meet new friends or acquaintances. I will forever enjoy offering advice on topics some know I am passionate about. Virtually, though, I’ve decided to remain delighted in our family’s mysterious, chaotic, and mostly private, personal abyss!

❀ Jess

Join the conversation!

After explaining all of this, I am genuinely curious as to others’ opinions on this topic? As a person that always examines and the re-examines my choices, what do you see as detriments to my lack of personal social participation? Has anyone ever wished they would have posted more intimate things on-line?

This is an opinion piece and I realize not everyone shares this perspective. Who knows…maybe I will change my own at some point! I, too, enjoy following people that post openly on their personal lives within their social accounts. At this time, my opinion is just that-an opinion! Please appreciate that we are all different, with different goals and needs in our lives!

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